Bach to Bark and back again!

Being a young chap full of questions, having Bing about has made me rethink many my daily routines.
For example…..music!

The joy of music is that anyone can enjoy whatever music they like, and, being such a massive area, there’s plenty to chose from.

I can generally tell if Mr B likes something I’m listening to, as he will happily curl up in the same room and listen (eyes closed) until the mood changes, then he will leave the room with a grunt and find something else to do!

I was listening to a recording of the tenor Tito Schipa the other day, when the noble head popped around the door and enquired who ‘that old wheezing geezer’ was.
I was momentarily hurt by his choice of words, but realised that probably a recording from around 1930 was not ideal for a chap like Bing.

‘Lummy guv you don’t half listen to some peculiar noises.’

I took the hint and faded Senor Schipa, and turned the wireless on.

Several minutes later the head reappeared…..

‘Well that’s a bit better, what noise is that?’

‘That, young sir.’ I said, rather too pompously, ‘That noise as you call it, is the Brandenburg Concerto No.2’

‘M’mmmmm who wrote that noise?’

‘Bach’

‘Oh all right, Woof, woof, growl, woof’n’howl?’

‘No not Bark but B-A-C-H pronounced BARK’

‘Was he a dog then?’

‘No I don’t believe he was, but come to think of it he’s often pictured wearing a wig that looks rather like a pair of earflaps!’

‘Show me’

We wandered into the lounge, and there I found a coaster (one of a set of composers) with a picture of the great man on it.

‘I see what you mean - a right old bloater aint ‘e?’

‘I believe he was actually a very pleasant chap.’

‘He’d have to, to be dressed like that!’

‘Well it was rather a long time ago, that’s how people dressed then.’

He gazed at the portrait for several moments.

‘You see aged poop, we hounds don’t have all that to worry about, one suit of hair does us very nicely thank you very much.

‘Yes I can see you really have solved the daily problem of what to wear.’

‘Whereas, lets face it you lot only have hair on top….and many of you cant even make that last!!’

We returned to the study and the music having changed was just coming to an end.

Announcer: ‘That was the overture to La Belle Helene by Jacques Offenbach'

‘Did he say what I thought he said?’

‘Yes that’s right.’

‘And did he?’

‘Did he what?’

‘Often Bark?’

‘Well…..do you know?…um…..’

Fortunately for me a piece by Schubert started to play. Bingo cocked his head and frowned.

‘Golly fancy calling your Shoe Bert, I wonder what the other one was called?  You folk on two legs are very odd to a young’un like me!’

The music was gentle and soothing and as I sat typing, the puzzled pooch stretched out and occasionally woofed as he slumbered. 

Heaven knows what the lad would have made of it’s title…

'The Trout'

‘Sounds a bit fishy to me guv!!!!!!’


Hey-ho.