'Gone with the Wind...........well almost!!

We are wandering around South Lowtown park, and being mainly flat, the wind is fairly whistling across the football pitches, and making me wish we were back home in the warm.

‘Stone me Bing it’s a bit draughty!’

‘Is it guv?’

‘Oh come on Bing your ears are flapping like a biplane pilots scarf!’

‘It’s only a slight breeze guv, honest.’

‘A slight breeze?’

‘Certainly old poop, certainly.’

‘Bing, it’s got to be a force 7 at least!’

He’s now inspecting a tree, and peering up into its lower branches.

‘Interesting guv, very interesting.’

‘Really?’ (I try desperately hard not to sound too ironic.)

‘Oh yes, I’m getting the wrong sort of scent in the wrong place.’

Naturally I can’t smell anything.  Not, I hasten to say, that I’m down on my knees and sniffing the grass and tree trunk!

‘M’mmmm, very fishy guv, very fishy indeed.’

He’s still peering upwards, nose twitching at a tremendous rate.
A couple of well wrapped strollers are wandering by, and I try to look as if all is normal. By now the lad is standing, front legs gripping the trunk and his neck extended to the limit!

‘Is he after a squirrel?’ they ask.

‘Um, no I don’t think so, he doesn’t usually make such an effort.’

The lad is now edging around the tree, still standing on his hind legs.

Fortunately the couple move on, just as we start to get in a tangle of Bing, extended lead and ME!

‘Bing, whatever it is, it must have gone, I really don’t think there’s anything up there now.’

‘M’mm….can you see what that is up there guv.?’

I peer upwards and there, lodging between a couple of branches, obviously carried by the wind, is the familiar carrier bag, issued by

‘Nicks Fish & Chip Bar.’

‘Can you reach it guv?’

‘Bingo I’m not going to attempt to shin up that tree, to retrieve an old fish and chip bag!’

‘Your no fun guv.’

‘Honestly Bing what are we going to do with it, if I did?’

‘Humph!’

‘Come on Bingo lets make for the car, I’m freezing.’

‘Humph!’

‘There really isn’t anything in the bag….honest.’

We start the trudge back to the car park, with a very brisk following wind!

‘Got any snacks guv?’

I start to search my pockets.

‘About that bag guv.’

'Y’eeees?’

‘I told you it was very fishy.’

‘Ah, I thought you meant the smell was odd.’

‘Nothing odd about fish guv.’

‘I suppose there isn’t.’

(Inwardly I'm thinking.)

....quite frankly Bingo......I dont give a..... D---!

(The inner sanctuary of the car, is a delight....for me!)