Bumps!

‘I’m puzzled guv.’

‘You Bing? ………………..Puzzled?’

‘Not half old codger. Puzzled, confused and so forth.’

‘And such like?’

‘Oh definitely and such like.’

We are in a break between rounds of ski jumping, and Bing has decided the second round will be better viewed, on his back and thus upside down. I’ve tried this, and have rapidly returned to the upright feeling rather giddy.. (Okay, at my age I should know better!!)

‘The thing is guv, Angela’s bump was not a bump but actually an Arthur.’

‘I see.’

‘It was rather a surprise when she came home the other day with an Arthur.’

‘He seems a jolly sort of chap Bing.’

‘He’s a sleeper, I know that!   Well that is of course, until Tom or Ange nod off and then he’s a waker!’

‘M’mm, young’uns often seem to do that.’

‘Really?’

‘Well they do in our family.

I sense that the lads brain is now positively rattling with thoughts, and decide to refill my coffee mug. I return and have just settled again when……..

‘Did Alison have bumps?’

‘Well she had a Will and later a Tom.’

The lad is now peering suspiciously at me.

‘What Tom?’

‘Yep.’

What Tom of Tom and Ange?’

‘Certainly.’

‘Crumbs.’

The Ski Jumping recommences, and the lad settles into his upside-down attitude.

During a pause because of fickle side-winds, I am aware that Bing has been pondering. He manoeuvres carefully until his gaze settles upon me. He gives me the sweetest of smiles and says…..

‘So guv, what’s your bump called?’