‘So what’s all that about guv?’ 

It’s the time when I wander about the house winding clocks and making sure all timepieces are approximately displaying the correct time.

I’m currently standing in front of the old Grandfather Clock, and winding the time and then the chime.  Strangely, whenever I do this, I think of the number of people over nearly 200 year’s, who’ve stood before it, doing the same thing. I’m just another person charged with this duty, and I hope many more will follow.

Job done I check the date is right and move on.

‘Well Bing each one of these ‘faces’ tells us the time, which in turn, enables us to be aware of any timetable we might be running to.’

Immediately the lad rolls on his back and……..

‘Oh ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha….he-he-he………’

He peers at me through his fringe and attempts to straighten his face…..

‘It’s no good guv…..ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!

‘And what young lad, is so funny about that?’

‘You……….running…oh ha-ha.....that’s hilarious!’

‘By running, I mean the running order by which we may be doing things.’

It’s no use, the boy Bing has tickled himself tremendously, and I’ll just have to put up with his chuckles and sudden explosions of mirth for the moment. I wander into the lounge to deal with a marble mantle piece clock, with a pretty chime. 

I turn to find the lad, on the arm of a settee to gain sufficient height to watch my efforts.

‘So guv, that grandfather clock in the study is the oldest ticker?’

‘Yes I should think so.’

I receive a mischievous look.

‘You’re a Grand pappy too, so I guess you and he were boys together eh?’

‘Bing, that ticker is nearly 200 years old!’

‘So you were a teenager when he first appeared?’

Again he dissolves into chuckles and hisses.

I have attempted on many an occasion to instruct Bing in basic history, and to give him an idea of the time-scale of events, but let’s face it, if I get too involved he merely shrugs and says…..

‘Hey I’m a hound. It’s interesting, like a faint scent from over the fence, but I’m not going to fret over it.’

So that’s me told.

Meanwhile, I have before me a small clock I found inside a box in the garage. With a certain amount of tinkering and much tup-tupping, I finally managed to get it going. Like many objects in our home it has a mind of its own and sometimes when being wound, it decides to throw a fit and unwind its spring mighty speedily! At this point I threaten it by shouting ‘that’s it, back in the box you go!’  A short while later I of course relent, and sit at the kitchen table fiddling and muttering, until once again it ticks away merrily.

Clock duties over for another week, I’m now enjoying a particularly nice cup of coffee. A familiar hooter appears above the table top…..

‘Have we forgotten anything guv?’

I peer over the top of my specs.

‘No I don’t think so, clocks sorted, coffee made and toast on the go.’

‘Being over 200 years old guv, I understand your forgetfulness, but a certain chap has not had a treat.’

‘Or three?’

‘Quite, quite old poop!’

The sun is shining, we decide to snack alfresco………we leave the house to our assorted 'tickers.'

　

Meanwhile……….




"TIME MARCHES ON!"